Tuesday, July 10, 2018

My Favorite Murder?

I'm not really one to delve into the whole podcast-thing but I've been listening to Sword & Scale on and off for the last year and I really liked it! 

But lately... I just haven't been feeling it. I've heard some things about the host of the show that makes me feel skeevy so I... might have to abandon it for a while. We'll see. I did like the show, it seemed well-researched and I loved the interviews and 911 calls (though it could feel a little gratuitous sometimes).

I've always loved all things true crime and have been gripped by murder for years. My husband, by default, turns on Forensic Files for me when he can't find anything else to watch. I've probably seen them all and usually by the first thirty seconds I'll go, "Oh yeah! This is the one where that guy stalked that girl and murdered her in her off-campus apartment and he was the handy man and creeped on her in the shower and yeah, I've seen this one." And then he'll roll his eyes and say, "You've seen them all!" 

I have so many true crime books that if anyone were to look at my bookshelves, they might begin to feel uneasy. I can't help it, that shit just fascinates me! I just have to explore the possible darkest, deepest evils of human nature. I have to know all the grisly details. It just makes me wonder why we are seemingly the only animals on Earth who murder for pleasure? We are definitely more complex than other animals and our motivations can be so much different but why, why, why?

Why are people hard-wired to want to kill people? Why do some people have horrific childhoods and want to kill people? Why do some people have horrific childhoods and don't? Do they understand why they do it? Do they want to change? Do they care? 

And I don't always think about the murderer, I think about the victims too. I think about their families. I think about when they bought that striped shirt that was later used as evidence splattered in their blood. I think about how they felt driving home, not knowing someone was waiting for them in their closet. I think about what they ate that day without knowing it was going to be their last meal. I think about how their day at work went. I feel for them. 

That leads me to the newest podcast, which I always thought had a strange name (UNTIL TODAY), My Favorite Murder.

For the first time, I really felt a kinship with some fellow murder-fans! (I don't love murder, you know, whatever.) The hosts opened the first episode talking about which murder story fascinated them the most and then I realized... I have a favorite murder too. 

What makes a murder your favorite? I guess it's a combination of fucked up-ness, weirdness, craziness, grotesqueness, and complete and utter shock, disbelief and horror. Well, that's what it means to me at least. 

My favorite murder is the story of Paul Bernardo and Karla Homolka. They're Canadian, they're a couple, and they murdered together. That's a whole other level of fucked up, right? They started their career (?) by drugging, raping and murdering Karla's young teen sister. Their relationship was just completely sick and Karla was a willing participant in his desires and activities. She helped lure other victims and she liked doing it. 

And one of the most heinous details is that Karla struck a plea deal saying she was coerced into participating and was abused by her husband- and then they found the tapes of her gleefully helping Paul in his crimes. But after the deal it was too late. She's out now. She has kids and is a regular PTA mom. Just sick and twisted. 

So that's my favorite murder. It's twisted and crazy and weird. I've heard them called the Barbie and Ken murderers which just creeps me out because of how their blonde and innocent good looks hid such a devious and depraved nature. You just never know what's hiding beneath that winning smile, do you? 

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